I wrote few blogs, but was not ready to release... may be laziness...
But last one week I was trying to finish this one...
I first met ashok @ a recruitment drive in 2008... he was new to the company, was in the panel... i also joined him in the panel with the same attitude of old employee... as always i was very lethargic in taking the i/v since I am a person who strongly believes that interviews are waste of time and not a right way to recruit right people... initially i thought he was technical guy, later understood that he is a CA and joined as functional consultant for an upcoming sub horizontal... Those who dont know ashok... lemme give some intro... he is short n sharp guy... he will be blunt in doing things. Since hez the first n only kid of his parents, he is such a high confident guy.... u cannot beat him in many things... bcoz whatever the case he will be logical n sensible... quite angry man in tellin the points upfront... cannot tolerate the attitude of being dumb (being dumb a necessary skill to survive in IT industry)... anything and everything should be completed ASAP and there should not be anything pending for the next day morning.... unless u r close to him... u will say that hez a person who hits you on face to make his point clear...
I think its enough about Ashok... why should i need to talk this much about this guy... all said if I say that he was crying on the phone with me... I am sure you dont believe me this. Thatz the power of life... it will make any hard man to break in to pieces... some of you know about it.. but lemme tell you why he cried on the phone... bcoz his 7 year old son was on the verge of death when we were talking on the phone before 2 weeks...
Aparajith... 7 yeras old.. is lean n not very tall kid... has all kind of mischievousness for his age... fast in doin things... frequently looses his temper... hez the first kid of Ashok born in 2004... he was brought up with all the pampering that a normal parents give for their first kid... I first met him in September'2010, when ashok's family landed in Macclesfield... the first question he asked was "wherez snow..." as his father told him about snow fall... i xplained him that it will come in the month of December... though the weather was pretty cold... he was not ready to wear the jacket... was getting shouts from his mother... ashok was xcited about all this... but being a man of perfection he was tryin to keep luggages preoperly at guest house...
Days started moving... aparajith started goin to school... his mother was not at all happy with the education pattent @ UK... was tellin that his learning capabilities reduced to an grear xtent... me and my wife were tried xplainin her that it is slow n steady approach... but still not happy... they all decided to go back to India by April'2011 so that Aparajith can start his education back... meantime more of ashoks' friends came on short trip... everyone were with aparajith... ashok planned lotz of short trips across UK... to fulfill the wishes of going out... after sometime ashoks' parents came to UK and they roamed around UK... finally in the month of april'2011 they all left to India... and that is the last time I saw Aparajith...
After a month of time. Ashok Alone came to UK to complete his project... Aparajith started goin to school... he got his friends back... he was njoyin his life... excpet he missed his father... but technology helped them to be in contact... they chatted in Skype... @ UK me n ashok went to shoppin (on every weekend) to get lotz of gifts for aparajith... we got around 20+ kgs of gift items n couriered them to India... the kid was very happy with those gifts...
One fine afternoon in the beginning of October'2011... I went ashok's room @ office... he was not normal... pretty nervous... I asked him whatz up... he was tellin that Aparajith was sick for past 2 days...as I always want others to feel better.. I told him that nothing to worry... may be weather change could caused... but things were not changing... within couple of days he was admitted in hospital... Ashok was becoming more nervous... Ashok was planning to go India once for good before deewali... he was getting updates from India which were not positive for him... mean to say... they were not encouraging... doctors were not able find why he is having fever and sick ness... he decided to pre pone his trip by a week... it was approved and he left to India on a sunday... all this time I was pretty nervous that nothing should happen to kid until ashok reaches India...
Ashok reached India.. till this time doctors were struggling to find the reason for the fever as all the testing were giving positive messages... but within a day of his arrival @ India doctors found that it is Rheumatic fever... Doctors told that it can be curable... but the kid should be given penicillin injection for next 15 years... I was on regular calls with Ashok to get the updates... Even his wife was confident as he is back and doctors also givin positve signs... I was stressing ashok to discharge his kid and take him to house for deewali... but whenever doctor was telling that he is alright within some time he will fall sick... doctors were not confident... but finally 3 days before deewali kid was discharged... i was asking ashok to celebrate deewali so that family will be out of all this worries... but being a man of perfection... he dont want as his elder son was not well. I called him the Deewali day... he was telling that fever was there and dont know what to do... as usual i was giving confidence to him... That weekend I was busy with something so I didnt call ashok...
On monday morning I got an update that Aparajith's health was getting bad... so he was sent to another major hospital... I called ashok... he was travelling in auto... voice was not encouraging... I can understand that he was getting scared... I was tryin to pass the positive messages to him...he was telling the his kid will be taken in to ICU since platelets counts were reducing... he broke in to tears in phone... U can manage n counsel whenever a woman cries... but it will be a challenge for you to manage whenever a man cries... I somewhat managed the situation... after closin his call... my brain started working faster... I need to recover this guy... he need people around him to boost his confidence... I called another common friend... asked him to go n meet ashok... I called my brother to check whether anything can be done from medical side as my sister in law is a doctor... being alwasys helpfull... he immediately reached out people... and found that the kid is being observed by one of the leading paediatrician of chennai... he was telling me that kid can be curable...
but next day was not good day for ashok... due to less platelets counts... kid had a blood transfusion... I was askin my offshore folks to be in touch with him... I decided to talk to my sister in law whoz a doctor... her friend is close friend of Ashoks' wife Radhika... but she was not giving any positive message to me... being a doctor she knows what was going there... she told that the boy was under ventilator...senior doctors are looking after him... i was gettin nervous... on wednesday i called ashok... his confidence level was goin down... as on tuesday Aparajith went in to Coma.. which he didnt even tell to his wife... my adrenal started workin at a high speed... i was gettin nervous... but i tried to give more confidence to him... within 3 hours I got call from my sister-in-law sayin that the boy is dead... my body started shivering.... again brain started sayin tht ashok needs someone around him... i called offshore n started tellin that bad news... unfortunately that day was the client visit... where the people in Video conference and the news was started spreading like fire... within an hour I got a call from another friend who said that the message was wrong.. the boy is alive...
I dont have the courage... but I gained confidence... called ashok... within few secs I broke in to tears n started cryin... ashok took upper hand n shouted at me... but next 2-3 mintues I became normal... ashok told that one of the doctor who saw the report told that boy will not survive... but need to take the MRI scan, for which the boy should be out of ventilator for more than 45 mins... he told that he was given options open for everything...I went to pooja room and prayed for that kid...now I started sayin sorry to all.. after some time my sister-in-law called me n told sorry... but she was telling that as per the doctors the chances for survival is remote... bcoz some dangerous virus went and sat on the heart and affecting the valves and it is affecting the blood flow to brain... So, chances for survival was very feeble though he survives he will not be normal as other kids..though part of this was told by ashok earlier... since my sister in law is a doctor... i started loosing confidence....
The full day I was nervous... night 7.30PM I got call fm ashok.. I was completely nervous... i called him back... it was normal call... he wanted to check how am I...he also told that doctors gave him options on the life of boy and he is open for all options... we spoke for 30mins... things were normal... but the boy was still under ventilator in a separate room in ICU... next day morning I got a message that the boy was fine over the night without further complications... it was giving some confidence to me... when I reached office i was given more confidence by gettin message like boy was taken to MRI scan... after that I was in to office work... by 4.45PM i got a call from a friend saying that ashok's son is declared brain dead... meantime I got a message from Ashok that "he is alive... but cannot be saved".. I decided not to cry... called ashok... now the ball was in his court... doctors told that Aparajith was brain dead... reason was blood flow to brain was stopped due to a clot...to remove that they need to give injection... but already the nerves were damaged so if they give the injection then the boy will immdtly die... So,if parents sign the papers, they can remove the ventilator and declare the boy as dead... the last word he told me was that he will sign the papers n take the son to home as dead... I think one of the most difficult signature that you ever think of making... declaring that I accept my son is dead (i dont know what was written in those forms)
Again I decided not to cry... i called our common friend...he was already on the way to hospital... i called other colleagues to reach hospital ASAP... within hour I got a call from our common friend that its almost over... ashok is pretty nervous...its matter of time... when hez going to sign the papers... i dont know what to do...after that i was in to some personal work... but mind was around ashok's family... no calls... updates from anyone... was awake till 12.30AM... but no updates... I dont have any guts to call ashok now... went to bed...
Morning saw few missed calls and voice mails... they were from my offshore counterpart... it was confirmed that the boy is dead... funeral is by afternoon...
I called my sister-in-law... she said that shez struck at hospital... i dont know what to do.... Something was tellin me that... this guy will pretend that he is strong... by not crying...called common friend... he was giving updates about the situation @ ashok's house... he also told that hez not cryin... I decided to fly to India to meet him...my wife was not clear... I told my friends that I flying to India to meet him... they are also not sure... Spoke to my brother... he was also not sure what to do...
2days later... I called Ashok... he was xplaining everything... i was pretty strong to receive all updates.... I told him that I am coming to India... He said dont come... I need to be strong enough to recover my family... he doesnt want to cry... he wants to keep his sadness with him... Real Ashok's attitude... I wanted him to cry... but took a deep breadh n decided not to fly... His family need to recover from this loss...
Sabharish... 4 years old boy... born in 2007...pretty active boy... trying to learn everything from his elder brother... from the car craziness to any games... was not very keen to go school... since his brother was going... he wants to compete with his brother... he went to school...roamed around UK with his brother when his family was in UK... for the past one month he was not sure whatz goin on around him... he frequently visiting hospitals to see his brother... he was happy since his father returned from abroad.. one fine morning he saw his brother was brought by people and kept in the middle of house and taken away... he was not sure what happened to his brother... he is askin his parents whether his brother still in hospital... they pretend that the brother is still in hospital and doctors are taking care of him... hez asking some logical question like in hospital whether his brother will be given proper food... when can he go n meet him... Poor Ashok n wife doesnt have any straight answer... bcoz the little one is the only hope for this parents... they dont want to tell him that his brother will never come...
I am sure this little one will slowly bring his parents back to normal... with all his child behaviours.. May be this boy will come to know from his friends, relatives that his brother will not come back... At that time... I really pray god that the kid should have courage to hear that news....
